Saturday, March 29, 2008

A Year and a Day

It's been 1 year and 1 day since our official approval by the agency, but almost 3 and a half years since we attended our informational meeting to being the process. It was one of the questions the birthmom asked us - how long have we been trying to's a multi-layered question. Technically? 1 year and 1 day. Emotionally? Since that very first informational meeting - and maybe before that. October 2004 would be when this journey emotionally started.

We received our new foster home license in the mail. It's a provisional license, as our last one was, designed for pre-adoptive foster placement only. But it was nice to get in the mail - one deep breath taken, because it meant there were no hitches in the update of our home study.

As we move in to this second year of "official" waiting - I'm reminded that MOST couples get their baby within 2 years of approval. If we are like most, then by this time next year, we should have our little one. However, SOME go as long as 4 years - as unbearable as that seems now - God has a plan and perfect timing. We're trusting Him.

I continue to pray for M, the mom we met on Tuesday. She's going through a whole lot emotionally right now, and is only halfway through her pregnancy. She's got major decisions to make, and definitely needs God's help making them.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Now we wait and wonder...

Well, our meeting this afternoon went well. I am always impressed by these mom's bravery in considering adoption, and today was no different. She asked us questions, and we got to talk to her and share some photos with her. I ended by telling her that I pray she makes the best decision for her baby, whether that's us or the other couple. Now we just have to wait and see.

Thank you to all of you who are praying for us and for this situation. We'll update as we find out...

UPDATE - Wednesday afternoon.
Our SW let us know that this mom is waiting until after her gender ultrasound on April 4th to make her decision.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008


We have a meeting set up on Tuesday afternoon with a mom who is due in August. She'll be meeting with 2 families whose profiles she liked, and then making her decisions from there.

I was at a point a few nights ago of wanting to put all the baby stuff away in the basement where I couldn't see it anymore. I decided that night that I would resign myself to never having kids, and just live vicariously through friends, and enjoy my students and the kiddos at church. By morning, I was a little calmer, and God gave me sweet rest that night - I remembered that it's a year of HOPE. As I told a friend a while ago, if I can remember these three things - God loves me, God has a plan, and He works for my good - then I don't get discouraged. God has been so faithful through this whole process.

Anyway, please pray. Not just that our meeting will go well, but that this mom will make the right decision for her baby. Whether or not that's us. Of course, we'd love for it to be us, but most of all, we want the best for the baby.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Longing for a Baby: What my life is like

Taken from an article by MaDonna Medley

To wake me up in the mornings, I need an alarm clock because there are no little ones to jump onto my bed urging me to wake up.

I take my time getting ready in the mornings, because I don't have anyone to dress but myself.

Instead of changing diapers, I pick up after the dog.

Instead of preparing lunch for school, I pour fresh food and water for the dog.

Instead of tiny fingerprints on my front door, I have old stains because I haven't cleaned the glass in a few months.

I have no clue what it's like to have a dryer full of little clothes that are "so aggravating" to fold.

I don't have a diaper genie, but I do have a nursery that's quiet and clean.

My refrigerator is covered with pictures of friends' children because I haven't had the opportunity to capture the beauty in the faces of my own.

My husband and I don't have any family portraits, because we don't have a "family".

We haven't had our picture taken since our wedding, because we feel incomplete.

There are no toys filling every area of my living room floor, only dirt dragged in by our shoes.

When I want to have a quiet moment, all I have to do is turn off the TV.

The only birthday parties we celebrate are those of other children.

We feel like the odd couple at church, because everyone else has children.

No, I don't know what labor pains feel like.

No, I don't know what it feels like to carry the world in your womb for 9 months.

I've never heard, "I love you, Mommy!"

If you have never experienced the pain of infertility, you can't relate. However, you can pray for us. We long to have what you have. If we don't congratulate you right away, or if we walk out of the room during a dedication or baptism, please don't be offended. These moments remind us of what's missing.

Don't miss an opportunity to hug, kiss, or play with your kids. Take advantage of every moment you have with them. Take care of them and raise them to love the Lord. And never miss the opportunity to tell them you love them.

For those who know what we're feeling, stay strong! Love those who have what you long for. Most important, pray for them. Be happy for them, even when it hurts the most. Trust in Jesus!

Monday, March 3, 2008

Jesus is...

Who is my Jesus? (click here to see...)

My Jesus is mighty, He is wonderful, He is powerful. He is faithful and true. He is God Almighty, the Keeper of promises and the perfecter of my faith. He is my Father, my Brother, and my Friend. He is all-sufficient for every need. He is more than enough.